In light of the political debates and the decline in collective listening skills, I thought I’d repost this blog entry from 6 years ago. It’s still as relevant today as it was then.

conversations on the fringe

Listening is such an important skill, especially when working with adolescents.  But, it’s a skill that isn’t often developed intentionally.  Some of us come by the gift naturally but others really struggle to truly listen to what young people are trying to say.  Good listening is not a passive activity.  The following is a crash course in active listening.  By using the following skills the listener will increase their capacity to discern underlying conditions, increase in empathy, and be able to assure the speaker that at least one person is really hearing their plight.

Attending

A: Eye contact
B: Posture
C: Gesture

S.O.L.E.R.

Five steps to attentive listening

Squarely face the person
Open your posture
Lean towards the sender
Eye contact maintained
Relax while attending

Paraphrasing

What is it: Restating a message, but usually with fewer words. Where possible try and get more to the point.

Purpose:

  1. To test your…

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